To Wax or Not to Wax

I finally started to get used to the Brazilian waxing process -- hot wax on my labia, my legs thrown over the shoulder of the aesthetician -- and now my friend tells me that the trend is for girls to skip the pubic waxing in favor of letting it all grow wild in the nether regions. Is this true? What are people attracted to anyway?
-- Sarah

Kelly Says:
Wax on. Wax off. It's hard to keep up. Your friend is right, though. It seems now that more women are going for that au natural look rather than for the trimmed, altogether hairless or sculpted look. I saw a girl once (at the gym, I swear) who had trimmed her mound into an arrow pointing south, and I wondered, "Who needs directions?" Poor girl.

I, for one, am in favor of letting a wee bit of growth come between me and my Calvins. Then again, I don't exactly have the tendency to sprout like a Mon-chi-chi in between trimmings (did I write that out loud?). Otherwise, I might think differently. I believe the most important factor is comfort level. If your hair (or your partner's) is getting in the way of your pleasure or confidence, do something about it.

Brent Says:
I don't know about trends, but I can tell you what most men like. They like it trim. Now, while I'm sure some guys enjoy a big bush, that doesn't hold true for the majority. Think oral sex, Sarah. If you want a guy to go down on you, for Pete's sake trim! There's nothing more unappealing than wading through a dense pubic jungle in search of the clitoris. It feels terrible and you end up leaving with souvenirs from your trip. Ugh.

The Brazilian is definitely the hottest trim. It makes everything visible during sex, which is a huge turn-on. Any trim is better than none, however, from the tightly shaved V, to the runway (a long vertical strip), to everything in-between. I think that part of the turn-on is that only strippers and porn stars used to shave, so it feels dirty (in a good way) and erotic when your partner does so.

Three's Company

I'm seeing a woman right now, and I'm totally in love. I don't want to have an affair, but I've always fantasized about having a three-way. How can I bring this up with her?

-- Brad

Brent Says:
Going for The Holy Grail, huh Brad? Every guy fantasizes about three-ways; the secret is that women do, too. Problem is, women can misinterpret interest in a ménage a trois as a sign that they aren't satisfying you sexually. Try posing it as a question to her. Something like, "Honey, have you ever fantasized about having sex with two people at the same time?" This makes it about her fantasy rather than yours. Once you get her talking, you can gradually -- assuming she's interested at all -- introduce the possibility of exploring the fantasy together. Don't pose the question immediately after sex or she'll really think you're making a comment about her performance and shut down the entire possibility. Pick a non-sexual time, perhaps bringing it up by mentioning that someone at work was talking about it. Finally, like my friend Gavin discovered, your girlfriend may love the idea, so long as the third is a guy. What's good for the goose...

Kelly Says:
I, myself, have never been privy to a threesome, but that certainly doesn't mean I don't advocate them. In fact, I think that three CAN be the magic number, so long as a few simple precautions are considered.

Perhaps the best way to approach the topic of threesomes is to have a pretend dry run during your next session. Try talking dirty and creating an imaginary scenario for you and your partner, describing where and how each of you would touch a mysterious (nameless) third, were they with you in the romper room at the time. If it goes well and your partner is aroused by the fantasy, suggest a carefully planned real-life three-way. Ask your partner who they might want to proposition, rather than blurting out, "Can we have sex with your friend Jody tonight?"