Rock stars get so much action it's insane. Put a guitar or a mic (hell, even drumsticks) in a guy's hand and chicks are crawling all over him like zombies on fresh brain. It's a phenomenon that has baffled scientists for centuries but 20 years ago, it was craziest. The market was less saturated so there was less rock star to go around.
With that in mind we sought out three rock stars with years of experience, all of whom are still doing exciting new things and were willing to share a bit of wisdom. Take heed grasshopper: It ain't called cock rock fer nothin'.
Sebastian Bach (Skid Row)
There are heartthrobs and there are HEARTTHROBS. Former Skid Row frontman Sebastian Bach, 40 in April, falls into the all caps category. In fact, at some point in 1990, I'm pretty sure he was scientifically proven to be the best looking man on the entire planet, if not in the whole universe. Since splitting with Skid Row, Bach has starred in Broadway productions of The Rocky Horror Show, Jekyll and Hyde and Jesus Christ Superstar (though he was allegedly fired from that last for diva-like behavior). He also had a recurring role on The Gilmore Girls, starred with Ted Nugent on VH1's Supergroup and appeared as a contestant on Celebrity Rap Superstar. Bach also recently released his third solo album, Angel Down, which features guest vocals by Axl Rose (How cool is that?) and a cover of Aersosmith's Back in the Saddle. Get it??? Bach/Back... See what he did there?
Lavalife: You must be excited. I'm wondering if the 80s revival is a help or a hindrance to someone like yourself.
SB: I don't pay attention to that. This record has nothing to do with that era. It's about 2007. That's what it sounds like. That's what it is. Having said that, the sound of my voice to a lot of people will always remind them of being a teenager back then. You can never deny that. More than one reviewer has said that I'm like a voice, not 'the voice' but 'a voice' of a generation that when you hear it, it brings back all these memories.
LL: You have two teenaged boys. How old are they?
SB: 19 and 13.
LL: What sort of dating advice have you given or would you give them?
SB: Don't get pussy whipped. Nothing fuckin' makes me crazier than seeing somebody I know become pussy whipped. It makes me nuts. I mean, I do whatever the fuck I want and my chick (Maria, Bach's wife of over 20 years) knows that and if she wants to be with me fine. I don't change who I am for anybody. I tell her all the time, you want to get somebody else, go right the fuck ahead. I don't give a fuck. 'Cuz I don't. I love her but I do what I want. And I told my 19-year-old son, like if he's got band rehearsal and his chick wants him to do something I'm like, 'Tell her to chill the fuck out and do what you got the fuck to do!' (laughs) Do your thing Dude.
LL: In the late-80s, early-90s you were, like, the best looking guy in the world. You must have been beating them off with a stick.
SB: People love singing. Singing touches people. It just does. As for how I look I don't know anything else. I have nothing to compare it to. You'd have to ask my parents about that. All I know is that the guys in my band love being in my band because they're from these death metal bands like Testament and my crowd looks a lot different than a Testament crowd. So we meet all these gorgeous girls and my band's going 'This is fuckin' great!' And we do I Remember You and all the girls start crying and the guys in my band are looking at me going 'I have never fucking seen this shit!'
LL: If you could do only one sexual position for the rest of your life, which would it be?
SB: Doggy style.
Mike Reno (Loverboy)
Mike Reno of Loverboy doesn't fit into his signature red leather pants anymore. In fact, Mike Reno barely fits into Mike Reno. Weight gain notwithstanding, the 53-year-old's voice is as strong as ever as evidenced on Loverboy's latest, Just Getting Started, available at almost half the price of new releases either through conventional retail or downloads and sure to be quoted during one of Loverboy's 100-odd gigs played each year.
Mike Reno: Just for the record, I like to say the word "saganaki." It's the Greek flaming cheese that's very excellent for your sex life. It gives you longevity with the women in an act of sexual prowess.
Lavalife: We're off to an excellent start... Do you think that the new Loverboy album is the single reason behind the surge of the Canadian dollar?
MR: I do. I think the reason the Canadian dollar is so strong is because Loverboy put out such a strong album.
LL: What song or album would you put on the stereo to set the mood with a woman?
MR: Anything by Barry White.
LL: Which Loverboy song would you put on for the same effect?
MR: Almost Paradise. Play Almost Paradise and you've got yourself pretty much... you're writing your own ticket into the old sack-inski, if you get my drift here.