"In the U.S. you sit in the restaurant and they bring you the main course immediately. It's all in the same plate. You have the meat, the vegetables, you may have the fruits also in the same dish. And you have to eat it very quickly before the waiter comes and takes your plate away."
This is the difference, he says. Flirting in France, "does not necessarily lead to sexual intercourse. In the U.S. when you start a thing like that it is a threat or a harassment because people think it will lead immediately to bed or to wherever else."
So, what can we learn from this? That not all eye contact, flirting, and even just plain social warmth has to lead to sex. And if we weren't so afraid of it, we might get some satisfaction out of it.
And yes, as noted earlier, the French have way more sex than we do. In the U.S. there is more multi-partnership and yet, more people are getting none. In France, says Giami, there are more monogamous people and everyone is getting more, including those over 50.
Giami also points out that the French are less concerned with marriage than North Americans. "In France," he says, "you don't have to get married to have a relationship. In the U.S. when you have a relationship you get married, at least, at the time the study was done." And he thinks this has something to do with the French getting more.
Still, if there is anything to learn from this it's that monogamy and romance actually get you more sex than philandering and disdain. Flies in the face of convention, doesn’t it?
So, if France isn't the most promiscuous country on the planet, what is? Are you ready for this? It's Finland. Wait…what?
No, that's right. In a 2008 study by David Schmitt at Bradley University, researchers surveyed 14,000 people in 48 countries, asking them to number their sexual partners and list one-night stands. People were given rankings between 4 and 65 -- the higher the score, the sluttier -- sorry, more liberal the respondent.
Finland scored highest, with an average of 51, but the country didn't technically nab the title of sluttiest country because it didn't qualify as industrialized enough to be an official part of the study.
Out of the qualifying countries the winner was the UK, with an average score of 40. So much for "No sex please, we're British" eh?
The hetero and homo "promiscuity index" (well, actually they called it "sociosexuality" and it didn't just measure promiscuity but we're going with promiscuity just the same) as it was dubbed, lists the 15 countries that do the most whoring around as follows:
- United Kingdom
- Germany
- Netherlands
- Czech Republic
- Australia
- USA
- France
- Turkey
- Mexico
- Canada
- Italy
- Poland
- Spain
- Greece
- Portugal
So, something to keep in mind when planning your vacation.
Meanwhile, the French will keep lingering over their hors d'oeuvres.
"France is not a sexy country," says Giami. "France is a romantic country more than a sexy country. In all the qualitative studies and analysis that I have done, we've found a very strong relation between sex and love."