Yet they stay rooted, glued to the status quo despite feeling miserable. Reasons can range from guilt and fear to family or financial commitments.
But there might be an even more compelling reason for leaving than simple ennui -- your health.
Two recent studies on relationships and health have shown that sticking it out in an unhappy union can actually make you sick. The effects on your well-being can range from general, persistent poor health right through to serious medical conditions such as heart disease.
In Sickness and in Health
Researchers from the University of Texas conducted a study of over 1,000 married people in the U.S., surveying them in 1986, 1989 and 1994. The results of the study, entitled You Make Me Sick: Marital Quality and Health Over the Life Course, were published in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior in 2006.
The study, led by sociology professor Debra Umberson, PhD, asked participants to rate their health and the quality of their marriage. Some examples of the types of questions participants were asked include: "How much does your husband/wife make you feel loved and cared for?" And "How often do you feel bothered or upset by your marriage?"
The results of the survey showed that, over time, everyone's perception of their own health appeared to decline. And while aging and increased poor health are an unfortunate fact of life, the decline in self-rated health happened quicker for people who were unhappy with their marriage.
The research team's findings suggested that years of strain, "putting up" with an unsatisfactory, unsatisfying marriage may slowly erode health. The compound effect of years of subtle but persistent emotional strain becomes more visible as we grow older. The study also found that existing medical conditions were also exacerbated by the stress of an unhappy marriage.
The study showed that people in unhappy marriages on the whole had more health issues than people who were happily married.
"The married do exhibit better health than the unmarried but it is not the case that any marriage is better than no marriage at all when it comes to health benefits," says Umberson.