5 Terrible Places to Have Sex

Your parent's bed

The threat of getting caught might seem exciting but what if you find "Lactating Lovelies" porn under the mattress?

In a Christmas tree farm

For god's sake think of the children!

A furniture showroom

Suburban shoppers really don't want to see your hairy ass as you test out the mattresses.

A hot-tub in a swingers bar

Think of all the spooge floating in that water.

Anywhere in Omaha

Just trust us on this one