10 Things You Never Want To Hear Your New Partner Say Post-Sex

1. "Sorry, I must have dozed off."
2.  
3. Well, I guess we won't be needing that cum towel after all."
4.  
5. Nothing. (Silence: it speaks volumes.)
6.  
7. "Funny, your profile didn't mention anything about being paralyzed from the waist down."
8.  
9. "Did you know you have exactly 23 glow-in-the-dark stickers on your ceiling?
10.  
11. "Don't worry about it. It was great. Besides, orgasms are so 2007."
12.  
13. "You done?"
14.  
15. "Now that's hot," he says, flipping through the latest issue of Bear Magazine.
16.  
17. "Would you look at the time.....better get going," she says, looking at her wrist. She's not wearing a watch.
18.  
19. And finally the worst thing your lover could say to you after your first time together is "That was... nice."
20.